Humour
Translation Gems Website
English -> French
the World Wide Web -> le monde sauvage du Web
anti-glare -> anti-glaire
the Intelligence Service -> l'intelligence artificielle
English for Techies by Christian Lassure
The Saga of Management Review of Writing Style
QUESTION: How many feet do mice have?
Original reply: Mice have four feet.
Management Comment: Elaborate!
Revision 1: Mice have five appendages, and four of them are feet.
Comment: No discussion of fifth appendage!
Revision 2: Mice have five appendages; four of them are feet and one is a tail.
Comment: What? Feet with no legs?
Revision 3: Mice have four legs, four feet and one tail per unit-mouse.
Comment: Confusing -- is that a total of 9 appendages?
Revision 4: Mice have four leg-foot assemblies and one tail assembly per body.
Comment: Does not fully discuss the issue!
Revision 5: Each mouse comes equipped with four legs and a tail. Each leg is equipped with a
foot at the end opposite the body; the tail is not equipped with a foot.
Comment: Descriptive? Yes. Forceful? NO!
Revision 6: Allotment appendages for mice will be: Four leg-foot assemblies, one tail. Deviation from this policy is not permitted as it would constitute misapportionment of scarce appendage assets.
Comment: Too authoritative; stifles creativity!
Revision 7: Mice have four feet; each foot is attached to a small leg joined integrally with the overall mouse structural sub-system. Also attached to the mouse sub-system is a thin tail, non-functional and ornamental in nature.
Comment: Too verbose/scientific. Answer the question!
FINAL REVISION APPROVED BY MANAGEMENT: Mice have four feet.
source John
3 men (a Belgian, a German and a French)...
... have an audition for a new job in England. The interviewer tells them: "OK, you'll have to formulate a sentence with the 3 words: green, pink and yellow."
First, the Belgian says: "I wake up in the morning, I eat a yellow banana, a green pepper and in the evening I watch the Pink Panther on TV".
Then, the German: "I wake up in the morning, I see the yellow sun, the green grass and I think to myself: I hope it will be a pink day".
And the French : "I wake up in ze morningk, I hear ze phone : green... green... green... pink up ze phone and I say "Yellow?"...
Submitted by Katja - Paris
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