Gazette:Jokes on translation
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Translation gems english to french
Olympic Games - Translation, please
One intriguing and occasionally hilarious aspect of covering the Olympics in a foreign country is the presence of interpreters, many of whom, especially in China, seem under orders to avoid controversial questions and answers. [[Gazette:Jokes:Olympic Games - Translation, please|/...
lost in a Chinese puzzle
The process of translation at Olympic press conferences can be more complicated than university-level algebra and there was a magic moment following Cuba's 7-6 win over Canada in baseball on Thursday. /...
Brit lost in American English translation
Harvey Burgess
I am a Brit in Tucson, and I am learning American English. I decided to do so after various encounters, including one in an Albertson's supermarket.
Me: Hi. Could you tell me where the trolleys are?
- Employee: Excuse me?
Could you tell me where I can find a trolley?
- Employee: Excuse me, sir. I'm not getting you.
You know, the things on wheels that we put our food in.
- Employee: Oh, gotcha. You mean the carts.
Yes, exactly, the carts.
- Employee: You can find them at 19 and the meat counter.
I beg your pardon? /...
The Saga of Management Review of Writing Style
QUESTION: How many feet do mice have?
Original reply: Mice have four feet.
Management Comment: Elaborate!
Revision 1: Mice have five appendages, and four of them are feet.
Comment: No discussion of fifth appendage!
Revision 2: Mice have five appendages; four of them are feet and one is a tail.
Comment: What? Feet with no legs?
Revision 3: Mice have four legs, four feet and one tail per unit-mouse.
Comment: Confusing -- is that a total of 9 appendages?
Revision 4: Mice have four leg-foot assemblies and one tail assembly per body.
Comment: Does not fully discuss the issue!
Revision 5: Each mouse comes equipped with four legs and a tail. Each leg is equipped with a foot at the end opposite the body; the tail is not equipped with a foot.
Comment: Descriptive? Yes. Forceful? NO!
Revision 6: Allotment appendages for mice will be: Four leg-foot assemblies, one tail. Deviation from this policy is not permitted as it would constitute misapportionment of scarce appendage assets.
Comment: Too authoritative; stifles creativity!
Revision 7: Mice have four feet; each foot is attached to a small leg joined integrally with the overall mouse structural sub-system. Also attached to the mouse sub-system is a thin tail, non-functional and ornamental in nature.
Comment: Too verbose/scientific. Answer the question!
FINAL REVISION APPROVED BY MANAGEMENT: Mice have four feet.
source John
3 men (a Belgian, a German and a French)...
... have an audition for a new job in England. The interviewer tells them: "OK, you'll have to formulate a sentence with the 3 words: green, pink and yellow."
First, the Belgian says: "I wake up in the morning, I eat a yellow banana, a green pepper and in the evening I watch the Pink Panther on TV".
Then, the German: "I wake up in the morning, I see the yellow sun, the green grass and I think to myself: I hope it will be a pink day".
And the French : "I wake up in ze morningk, I hear ze phone : green... green... green... pink up ze phone and I say "Yellow?"...
Submitted by Katja - Paris
